November 14 -- Yesterday I was practically in tears while I was doing my lesson plans. Long story short, I had a bunch of seniors skip class last Thursday because it became an impromptu senior skip day when the superintendent, in his infinite wisdom, changed the day from a scheduled day off to a school day to make up one of the six snow days we incurred during the recent snow storm. But, even though he was changing a vacation day to a school day, he told parents that if kids missed school (presuming there might be pre-scheduled vacations since the day was originally scheduled as a day off) they would not be penalized. So our industrious teens decided it was a perfect day to play hookey. Why not? -- they wouldn't be penalized! Ugghhh..
I had only half of my Great Books, Great Films students -- seniors --in class on Thursday with a paper due. So I was really upset planning today's lesson because I KNEW those kids who missed last week's class would not have their papers today. I knew that they would breach our contract, would assume I would let them hand it in tomorrow. Except I didn't. I had already moved their deadline from last Tuesday to Thursday. (I don't think they were thinking about a skip day when they begged me to move the deadline the first time. And, listening to their pleas about downed wires and broken internet connections, I consented to move the due date to Thursday.) But today was MOnday. Lots of time for them to finish their papers.
And when they came to class. All SEVEN kids did not have their papers. I was so sad. I know they thought I would change my mind...
Bud I didn't. I told them that I was many things -- positive and negative -- but one of them was not a doormat. They were NOT going to walk all over me. (And they tried; they tried.) I said that if they got me their papers today I would give them credit. But one second past midnight and it was a zero. My stomach was in knots all day. These kids are practically ADULTS. But they still think like babies. It's all about the fun, fun, fun. I kept asking myself, did I not reach them with my inspirational (ha), heated conversation about the importance of honoring a verbal contract?! With my persuasive metaphor about how their commitment to a verbal contract (especially when nobody was looking) was a sign of character (or lack thereof.) I was really proud of myself for being strict. But wary. After all, these are teenage boys (and one girl) for God's sake. What did they really hear?
During the day, one student (the girl) brought me her paper, finished during a study hall at computer lab. One kid. That was all.
After school, I came back from my staff meeting hoping to find some papers on my chair. There were none. I was so dejected. After a half hour or so of walking around the empty hallways, shoulders slumped in despair, I finally squared them once again, determined to shrug it off. What else could I do? At least there were half of the kids who actually did the paper. Cheers for them. (truly)
And then tonight, I got the emails. The papers were coming!!!! Four of them so far. Hooray. At least there is hope. So I will take that to the bank. For now. Because "now" is all I have.
As I am reflecting about all of this I am thinking that it might be just a little scary to see how much I care about all of this. yipes...
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