March 11 -- I am so sad. Tonight is one of those nights that will go down in history, at least in my mind. I stupidly hit the wrong button and erased a voicemail I had saved for at least six years on my cell phone. In fact, I loved it so much, I had transferred it from my first cell phone to my next one. But when I played it for the kids, everyone was laughing and I accidentally hit erase instead of save and it was gone. I feel bereft; I really do. In the scheme of things going on today -- Japan's 8.9 earthquake and tsunami, and all the loss in that country, I suppose my little voicemail of Connor begging me to come home and Luke in the background telling him to shut-up is nothing. But it was a huge part of my phone, a huge talisman so to speak. I had Tessa on there too, announcing Riley's lost tooth. When I erased Connor's nine-year old voice, I erased Tessa's too because really, I couldn't keep one if I lost the other. It's weird. It's just a voice mail but since we never took videos of the kids I was always so proud of that voicemail. I loved listening to it. I just did.
And now it's gone. I feel like such a jerk. I don't know why I am making this mean so much but I am just really sad. Dumb I know but it is what it is.
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