Race To Nowhere

March 29th -- I went to see Race to Nowhere, the documentary about education in the United States and the problems inherent in the system.  It's late and I am really tired but my quick assessment of the movie is that it was very good and thought provoking.  It made me want to ask my kids a lot of questions.

The movie was dedicated to the memory of a young 13 year old girl who committed suicide because she had failed an Algebra test in 8th grade.  This was a child who excelled at everything but when she took advanced math, she started to slide.  And apparently, because her parents saw absolutely nothing else wrong, this one bad grade put her over the edge.  I guess her dad had thought she was changing as a child but the guidance counselors at the school said she was just "behaving like a normal 13 year old."  But deep down, where nobody could see, the F she got on her test was unacceptable in every sense of the word.   It's every parent's worst nightmare.

The movie is based on the stress level in education, the pressure on kids to be the best, to take the most AP courses, fill out the resume with the most activities, etc.  It was interesting to watch because with Luke in his senior year, we are in the thick of that kind of pressure.  It is hard.  Really hard.  Are we guilty of pushing him?  Yup.  But what I have realized -- and this is huge -- is that in all of the hubbub of college seeking, applications and whatnot, I have never EVER heard of a student who has not been accepted by at least one school.  Not one.  So if a kid doesn't want to join a club, or a sport or work in the community, so what?  If that stresses a child out, back away.  They will get into a school, somewhere.  It won't be Harvard but who cares?  They will get into a school.  And if they flourish in that school, albeit one with a less prestigious name, maybe they will go on to bigger or better.  Or maybe they won't.  In the long run, they will be fine.

If I got one thing out of that movie, it's this -- we all have to stop being so afraid of being the last person in the race.  After all, it's just a race to nowhere.  We will get to where we are supposed to go when it's time to get there.  For God's sake, (and ours) let's just try to enjoy the trip.