Falling Apart

December 20 -- As the holiday draws closer and closer...my children seem to be falling apart.  (along with their mother.)  Tessa is stressing about "completely forgetting everything form her math chapter" and having to go after school to prep for a test tomorrow.  Riley is in melt down mode.  He went to bed and started to sob.  (Tessa came downstairs and gave me a heads up.)  I knew it...he just seemed off tonight.  Turns out he got an 84 on his math test in school and was upset because he broke his A+ streak.  (The kid is NOTHING like his older brother, Laid Back Luke.)

     Connor was pissed because at the United Way Youth Board meeting, the girl who came after him in the holiday Yankee Swap took his $15 iTunes gift card and left him with a $10 Dunkin Donuts card and a snowman Christmas ornament.  "I hate Dunkin Donuts," he said as he slipped into the car.  "Let's just go and spend this as soon as possible."  As I drove off, shaking my head in wonder at this newfound Dunkin Donuts animosity, he dangled the ornament in the air.  "And I got this ornament.  I hate Christmas ornaments.'   I was like, whoaaaaaa.  Somebody's gotta plan an intervention for this family of mine.  Little too much drama and overreacting to basically stupid things.  (Although I am totally grumpy about school right now.  I am thinking about what would happen if I quit...)

I think we all could use some R & R...  But really?  We have to learn to deal with this stress right now.  Starting with Riley not being upset about his math score.  (I think I helped him with that as we laid together in his bed and compared his 84 to the Packer's losing to the Chiefs last Sunday and snapping their winning streak.  Sometimes, ya just gotta take a hit to gain perspective.)  As for Connor and his grumpiness about the Dunkin Donuts gift certificate, I suggested that he use it in the family Yankee Swap at Christmas.  And as for my issue with teaching?  Not sure how to deal with that.  One day at a time, I guess.  In the meantime, I said to Brian tonight, " I don't care if I am not the best teacher with the most done.  My family comes first."  And as I held my crying son in my arms and thought about the papers waiting for me downstairs I held my resolve.  Family first.  For sure.