December 23 -- I have realized that over the last couple of days I cannot complete sentences. I start a comment and suddenly, mid-sentence, my voice kind of loses steam and suddenly, I can't even finish the sentence. I am utterly exhausted and I honestly cannot remember ever being this tired. I knew it would be hard to go back to work full time and maintain a somewhat firm grip on motherhood but wow... I am majorly out of shape. For obvious reasons, this deficiency in stamina is highlighted during the holiday season which can tax the energy levels of even the most mellow and under-scheduled of moms.
Tonight we finish wrapping gifts and then...tomorrow is Christmas Eve. And my dad's birthday. I saw him tonight when I went over to my parents to help set up for Christmas Eve dinner. At one point I came downstairs and found him stealing some pretzels from the snack jar my mom has on the desk. "Hey," I said, interrupting the theft. "I will see you tomorrow Dad." And he looked at me, all confused. "Why? What's tomorrow?" I just shook my head and smiled. "Dad, it's your birthday." He just laughed. "Oh yeah?!" he asked. It's a fascinating concept to consider living a life where you have no clue you are getting older. Not something I am living right now -- I am totally aware of my aging body and mind. Now off to find the tape for wrapping...
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